How to Persuade People Who Don't Want to be Persuaded
by Joel Bauder & Mark Levy
Draw in the Listener
You will not have to sing, dance, act, recite, get up in front of crowds, or wrestle in mud, unless you want to. When I talk about entertainment as a persuader, I mean that you will use compelling, often whimsical strategies designed to put people in a receptive mood for what you have to offer.
And keep in mind, entertainment isn't necessarily light-hearted. A drama is entertaining, So is a horror film. In the work we'll be doing together, you'll be using the full range of human emotion to make your point forcefully...
Change in the Moment
What you do can have a remarkable effect on people. Don't believe me? Try this: Ask a friend to think about the best summer day she's ever experienced, then watch her closely. You'll witness a striking change in her physiogamy and demeanor.
She may look about dreamily, as if she's trying to orient her mental image in physical space. Her eyes may widen while her jaw slackens. She'll speak slowly, and then, as she catches hold of a visceral memory, she'll ramp up and tell you about a childhood trip to the carnival or a long kiss on a park bench.
By the time she's finished, she'll be grinning and feeling as though she's found something she'd lost. She may even be teary eyed. And all you did was ask a question. You changed her thoughts, her posture and her outlook with a question. One question! That's power.
You didn't wrestle her into a happy state. You set the proper conditions and let her mind do the rest. You changed her moment.
Most people walk around in their problems. They view life through their perceived limitations. They measure today by what happened yesterday.
When you change the moment, you shift people's perspective, taking them from where they are to where they'll like to be. From that vantage point, people will be more attentive and receptive to your propositions...
"Overall, the factors most highly associated with getting [the executives'] attention, in rank order were:
1. The message was personalised
2. It evoked an emotional response
3. It came from a trustworthy or respected sender
4. It was concise
The messages that both evoked emotion and were personalised were more than twice as likely to be attended to as the messages without those attributes.
- Harvard Business Review (Sep - Oct 2000)
The Transformation Mechanism
Change abstract ideas into mental images that people can see. Or things you can show them. Eg. Comparing your shoe to a project you're heading - the stitching, the laces, the heels etc.. Show them.
Create an entertainment inventory
- What tasks do you do during a workday?
- What are your hobbies?
- What skills do you have?
- What tricks and puzzles do you know?
- What is the quirkiest thing you know how to do?
- If you were in a talent show, what would your act be?
The Body Metaphor
The Paper Metaphor
The Quick Pitch Opening
Build your own opening.
Eg. "I'm a cyber-defender. I enable families, friends, and businesses to communicate on the Internet in a way that makes criminal third parties incapable of overhearing their sensitive information." (Security Programmer)
- Who are your clients?
- Why do your clients hire you or purchase your product?
- What processes do you use to generate results for your clients?
- How might your clients' clients be affected by your job?
- Who are your competitors, and how are you better?
- Have you won any awards, been cited in the media, or garnered praise from a recognised source?
- How do you guarantee your work?
- What are your business success stories?
- Can you create metaphor or simile around you, our business, or your process?
Conversational Keys
- Listen deeply.
- When you start a conversation, assume that you have something to give the other person and that person has something to give you.
- Listen actively - rephrase what he says, with analysis.
- Rephrase your questions - tie your questions to her past experiences.
The Slogan Pitch
A slogan can be:
- a feature
- a benefit
- a question
- a challenge
- a structure
- exciting - "if you love what you've seen, that's only 5% of what it can do!"
- boastful - "You won't have competition because you will have annihilated them."
- self-referential - "We're an American institution with international penetration."
- tongue-in-cheek - "I hate to destroy thousands of jobs, but we're just that good."
- inspiring - "One vision! One solution!"
- painful - "You walk away, and tomorrow will be no different from today."
Samples serve 2 functions:
1. They show prospects that the business's products do what the business claims to do.
2. They let prospects test the products to make sure the products fit what the prospect wanted.
Things to think about when it comes to creating a sample of your offering.
2. They let prospects test the products to make sure the products fit what the prospect wanted.
Things to think about when it comes to creating a sample of your offering.
1. Ask yourself, "What process do I want to demonstrate to the people I'm trying to influence?" and "What results do I want to show them?"
2. Make a piece of your process or result into a sample.
3. Customise your sample.
The Power of Free
Eg. Some Ring-in-a-Spring trick toy.
In one approach, you can call it "a gift" and say nothing more.
In another, you cam say, "I am giving you a gift you can use for the rest of your life. It's a gift that will make you the star of every family get-together, that will make you the center of attention at your next boardroom meeting. It's a device that is as easy to operate as it is potent, and will put a smile on people's faces, as it gets their minds racing. Ladies and gentlemen, don't you dare leave! Not until I teach you the secret of "The Ring on Spring"!"
Not only do people want freebies, they want it now. Try to give the people their gifts immediately. Our society demands instant gratification. Criticise that fact, or use it to your advantage.
The Power of Gifts
Important thing is you should not expect anything in return. You're giving as a way of celebrating friendship and life. If people want to give you something in return, let them. But don't make them feel obliged. If you do, it's not a gift anymore - it's a transaction.
Solid Proof
While you should collect abundant proof substantiating your claims, be selective.
Give the prospect what he's concerned about.
Dynamic Clarity
"I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want." - Mark Twain
How do you get clear of what you want?
In the book "Dreams into Action", author and acting teacher Milton Katselas says:
2. Make a piece of your process or result into a sample.
3. Customise your sample.
The Power of Free
- Who am I trying to influence?
- What am I trying to influence them about?
- Do I have any relevant information that I can give them freely, that they'll find valuable?
- Do I have any relevant physical items I can give them freely, that they'll find valuable?
- What can I say or do that would get them to fully appreciate the value of the information or item?
- When's the best time to give them the information or items to help my case?
Eg. Some Ring-in-a-Spring trick toy.
In one approach, you can call it "a gift" and say nothing more.
In another, you cam say, "I am giving you a gift you can use for the rest of your life. It's a gift that will make you the star of every family get-together, that will make you the center of attention at your next boardroom meeting. It's a device that is as easy to operate as it is potent, and will put a smile on people's faces, as it gets their minds racing. Ladies and gentlemen, don't you dare leave! Not until I teach you the secret of "The Ring on Spring"!"
Not only do people want freebies, they want it now. Try to give the people their gifts immediately. Our society demands instant gratification. Criticise that fact, or use it to your advantage.
The Power of Gifts
Important thing is you should not expect anything in return. You're giving as a way of celebrating friendship and life. If people want to give you something in return, let them. But don't make them feel obliged. If you do, it's not a gift anymore - it's a transaction.
Solid Proof
- Client Lists
- Client Testimonials
- Celebrity Endorsements
- Association and Organisation Memberships
- Expert Opinion
- Survey Results
- The Real Reason Why
- Specificity
- Case Studies
- Photographs
- Guarantees
- Props
While you should collect abundant proof substantiating your claims, be selective.
Give the prospect what he's concerned about.
Dynamic Clarity
"I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want." - Mark Twain
How do you get clear of what you want?
In the book "Dreams into Action", author and acting teacher Milton Katselas says:
It's hard to face specifics, but you must. Define everything, no matter how small it seems. Write down every detail... If you're an actor and want a TV series, what type?... Don't get into this vague idea about wanting to be a successful actor, a successful businessperson, a successful architect. That doesn't cut in... Know what you want. Make it real.
Remember though, the "why" you want is not important. When it comes to things you're passionate for, knowing why isn't going to do you any good.
Be Distinct
Pick a position. Having a focused position gives us better chance of being noticed and remembered.
Some slants to position yourself by:
Overcome Resistance
Straightforward Approach.
Get a list of common objections about the product you're selling.
They fall into two categories:
- One is about the product or service itself ("not enought functions", "too expensive", etc)
- Two is about the person's ability to deal with the product or service ("broke", "no room for that", etc)
Research the facts - give a rationale for each of the objections.
Eg. The product is 10% more expensive than other similar products because it has a 20% greater energy efficiency than others.
Side Approaches
The Look
The Platform Pitch
The Build, Hold and Move steps.
The Mechanism Emergency Kit
- What projects do you want to take on?
- Who do you want to work with?
- Where do you want to work?
Remember though, the "why" you want is not important. When it comes to things you're passionate for, knowing why isn't going to do you any good.
Be Distinct
Pick a position. Having a focused position gives us better chance of being noticed and remembered.
Some slants to position yourself by:
- by feature
- by benefit
- Get clear about who you're trying to persuade and about what you're trying to persuade them.
- Find out what you audience most values when it comes to your offering.
- Take an attribute from your offering, one that your audience would closely associate with what they value.
- Make sure that no one else in your field is definitively associated with that attribute. It they are, find a way to alter that attribute so it's unique to you.
- Push that attribute- that position - for all it's worth. Build your presentations, mechanisms, and marketing materials around it. Be single-minded.
Overcome Resistance
Straightforward Approach.
Get a list of common objections about the product you're selling.
They fall into two categories:
- One is about the product or service itself ("not enought functions", "too expensive", etc)
- Two is about the person's ability to deal with the product or service ("broke", "no room for that", etc)
Research the facts - give a rationale for each of the objections.
Eg. The product is 10% more expensive than other similar products because it has a 20% greater energy efficiency than others.
Side Approaches
- Pretend you don't understand the objection - and ask the client to explain
- Ask the client what he really wants to know
- Refer to one of your clients who had the same objection
- Make her objection into a joint objective
- Make her objection the very reason to go ahead with the deal
- Agree with the objection and reaffirm your main benefits
- Get the client to see the consequences of not using your product or service
- When getting a lot of resistance, instead of overcoming them, it's sometimes better to focus on strengthening your presentations. Ask them what they like best about your product. And clarify with them some benefits they have missed out on.
- Attitude is very important. When you walk in to make a deal, you should be thinking that you're a gift to them. That you'll improve their businesses. That they'll be thankful that you came at the end of the day. You are not an expense, intrusion or liability. Sell yourslf on yourself. Convince yourself that what you're offering is worth far more than what you're asking for.
The Look
The Platform Pitch
The Build, Hold and Move steps.
The Mechanism Emergency Kit
posted by Jinrui at
12:48 PM
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